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The Secrets of Romantic Love

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Everyone wants that special someone to grow old with. Romantic relationships can be surprisingly easy to come across, yet difficult to maintain. Unfortunately, most of us will endure heartache a few times in our lives before we find the perfect partner for us.

Once we find the one we want to share our hearts and the rest of our lives with, it becomes incredibly important to take the time to learn how to strengthen that romantic bond with each other. It’s crucial to understand that it takes long-term commitment and a willingness to work on our relationships in order to find romantic love that will last a lifetime.

Are There Even Any Romantic Secrets Anymore?

Whether you’re looking for a new relationship, or you’re trying to improve the one you’ve got, here are several ways you can help deepen the connection you’ve built with your partner.

Be True to Yourself and Who You are

Honesty is the foundation of all successful relationships. Especially of the one you have with yourself.

It’s important to make sure that your relationship with your partner is grounded on that concept. Don’t ever conceal your likes, dislikes, or feelings with your partner.

The only way that a relationship can ever strengthen and grow is through mutual understanding and open communication. It doesn’t do you or your romantic partner any good if you are constantly avoiding frank and honest conversations about how you really feel. This rings true for any relationship. You can only strengthen your romantic bond with your partner if you aren’t afraid to reveal your true, authentic self.

Support Your Partner in Their Time of Need

two lovers who support each other happily

Just be there for them, ok?


Most relationships will endure trials and tribulations. It could be the loss of a job, a pet, a family member, or any number of life’s setbacks. Regardless of what it might be, it’s important to be there for your partner and be their shoulder to cry on if necessary.

True romance is built on friendship, and an important component of being a good friend is being there for each other when times get tough. People handle these setbacks in many different ways. Some may need a lot of emotional support, while others may simply need to know that you’re there for them if they ever need to talk. Being there for your partner and letting them know you’re by their side will deepen your connection and strengthen your romantic bond with each other.

Allow Each Other Space to Explore Personal Interests

Many people mistakenly believe that the most successful romantic relationships are dependent upon spending all of your free time together. In fact, this is the opposite of what most successful couples do.

Not only is it healthy to have personal and professional interests outside of your relationship, it is absolutely necessary in order to maintain romantic connections with one another.

While you may have several interests in common with your romantic partner, there are probably things that you enjoy doing that they don’t particularly care for. Encourage your partner to explore their individual interests too, whether it’s inline skating, archery, or any other hobby they may be interested in pursuing. By maintaining some separate interests, you’ll keep your relationship fresh by having new things to talk about over dinner dates.

Treat Each Other With Respect Even Throughout Your Disagreements

It can be hard to remember why you chose your partner when you’re in the middle of a heated dispute. We often become defensive when we’re in the throes of an argument. It’s important to remember that you should never belittle or degrade your partner during these times.

On a related note, it’s also important to never talk negatively or disparagingly about them to others after an argument is resolved. Not only does this show major disrespect for your partner, but this disdain will often seep into your relationship and diminish any romantic feelings you have for each other. Try to fight fairly, and walk away and take a break so you can revisit the topic at a later time when you’ve had some time to calm down.

Beware of Getting Bit by the Jealousy Bug

There are few things less attractive than being insecure in your relationship.

If your romantic relationship is healthy, you shouldn’t have overwhelming feelings of jealousy every time they want to spend some time on their own or hang out with their friends.

People who are in a healthy romantic relationship will encourage their partner to enjoy time with friends and family, and won’t become obsessive over their whereabouts every time they aren’t with them. Over time, this jealousy can cause serious (and sometimes irreparable) damage to a romantic relationship. Try to let these feelings subside, and use these times apart to explore your own interests or catch up with old friends.

Be Realistic With Your Expectations, You Aren’t Perfect Either

Let’s get real. Prince (or Princess) Charming isn’t going to come through your door and sweep you off your feet.

Those kind of romantic relationships are only found in movies. Real, romantic love is built over time, and takes real work. Don’t expect a champagne brunch and a dozen red roses every weekend. Not only is this an impossible standard for any person to maintain, it’s also expensive!

If you’re looking for lasting, romantic love, you must accept that lust fades over time. Real, romantic love is a commitment, and is built up and strengthened over time. By lowering your expectations just a bit, you’ll come to appreciate all the little things that your partner does for you, setting the stage for genuine romantic love that lasts a lifetime.

Accept Your Partner for Who They Are

a beautiful girl being herself and being accepted by her man

If you sought your partner out with the mindset that you can change them, you seriously need to reevaluate your relationship. And your core beliefs.

The truth is, you can’t change anyone. When a person shows you exactly who they are, believe them. You will never change someone, whether it be their beliefs, work ethic, interests, or personality.

You should never seek to change anyone in a romantic relationship. This ties into being your true, authentic self. If your partner has a few flaws or things that irk you from time to time, that’s okay. If your romantic relationship is built on a foundation of love and trust, you should be able to overlook such minor details. No one likes to be coerced into changing anyways, especially by one’s romantic partner. Trying to change your partner will often lead to resentment in the long run.

Seek Out New Experiences to Share With Each Other

Keep your romantic relationship fresh by seeking out fun new adventures to experience together. Shared experiences tend to bring romantic partners together, especially if they are particularly memorable or unique.

This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to book a cruise to Cancun this summer. Go online, and check out a few new activities you’ve been wanting to do that are close to home. This could be a painting class, miniature golf, or visiting the new gastropub that just opened up down the street together. Running a 5k can be a fantastic experience and goal to share with your partner, especially if you train together before the big race.

If you’re in a long term romantic relationship and find that the romance is fading, breathe new life into it by thinking outside the box. By enjoying new experiences together, you’ll deepen your romantic connection with each other and get to see each other in an interesting new light.

Don’t Compare Your Relationship With Others

Yeah, we know. Your friends never have any problems in their relationships and are the happiest couples ever. And if you believe that, we have valuable oceanfront real estate in Nebraska you should really see.

Many of us are guilty of getting trapped up in the comparison game. Whether it’s our best friend, sibling, or a random couple on social media, we often find ourselves comparing our romantic relationship with our partner to other people’s relationships.

It’s important to remember two things when you’re tempted to compare your relationship with others. First, your romantic relationship is unique in its circumstances and the people who are involved. You and your romantic partner have completely different personalities, lifestyles, and interests to those that you are probably comparing yourselves to.

The second thing to remember is that people always want to paint their romantic relationships in the best light possible on social media. You don’t see other couples’ fights or dirty laundry posted online. What you see on social media is not always the whole truth. Maybe one of them is posting something very, very romantic while thinking about how to get my ex back and pondering their life choices. People tend to post highlights of their romantic relationships online, not the day-to-day reality.

By resisting the temptation to compare your romantic relationship with others, you’ll find you’re much happier with your partner and content in your love for each other.

Keep the Romance Alive With Small Surprises Often

Romantic relationships are often built on small tokens of love and appreciation rather than big, extravagant displays.

While being “wined and dined” at a five star restaurant can be a nice surprise, lasting romance doesn’t need continual extravagance.

Small acts of love on a consistent basis are the foundation of romantic love. Pick up their favorite candy bar the next time you’re at the convenience store, or bring them coffee in bed every once in a while. These small tokens show you truly care about their well being, and can strengthen the bond between you.

Always Make Time for Your Partner

A couple in love having a romantic dinner

Your time is the most valuable asset you have. Think about how you spend it and with whom.

In this day and age, it can be all too easy to get caught up in all the minutiae that makes up our daily lives. Between work, social obligations, and other matters, it can be difficult to make time for your partner, especially when you’ve been in a long term relationship. Over the years it can become easy to take each other for granted. If left unchecked this can lead partners to grow apart, and perhaps even go their separate ways.

To maintain a long term connection with your romantic partner it is important to carve out at least a few minutes of quality time per day with them. Set an alarm to spend a little time with each other at the end of the day if you need to, and discuss how your day went and catch up on the details of each other’s lives. While setting a timer may seem silly at first, it shows your partner that you are truly invested in making the relationship work and helps you build your romantic bond so that it can last a lifetime.

Evaluate Your Life Goals Together

In order to make sure you and your romantic partner continue to be on the same page, it’s a great idea to reevaluate where you want to be in the next three, five, and ten years with each other. Long term couples will find that their relationship undergoes a natural evolution over time. People grow and change, discover new interests, and modify their plans as they get older.

Maybe when you first committed to your partner you both planned to book a vacation abroad in the next few years, but now your interests have changed. It’s important to sit down and discuss these life goals with them in order to make sure you are still on the same page. If you discover you are not, see if there are ways in which you can still be supportive of each other’s dreams without giving up on your own in the process.

Here’s The Secret – Romance is More than Hearts and Roses


While being in a new relationship can bring butterflies and excitement, a strong romantic connection with our partner is dependent upon much more than date nights and roses. It takes honest and open communication, commitment, the ability to see past each other’s faults, and hard work. No relationship is perfect. Even seemingly flawless couples have their own fair share of issues.

Fortunately achieving real and lasting romantic love is possible, as long as you and your partner are committed to treating each other with love, respect, and honesty. Physical connection is important, but looks will fade away. By following these tips and sharing them with your romantic partner, you can be sure that your love will only strengthen, grow, and withstand the test of time.